Showing posts with label Zimbabwe Mugabe. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Zimbabwe Mugabe. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

The Ebagum Show continues

Yessim, it's been a loooooong while,
but I'd kinda hoped the Zim situation might have untangled itself by now.

No such dang luck.

Uncle Bob Mugabe (aka Ebagum) continues his insane tirade against the gay colonialists and Aunty Grace "Many Funerals" Mirafu keeps digging graves for all her many pairs of designer shoes.

1. In the mean time, a pregnant man gave birth to a bonny baby girrrl on Sunday 29 June. Thomas Beatie, 34, is both a Proud Dad and a Beaming Mother, the best of both worlds perhaps? And his/her daughter? “She’s really cute, really pretty,” a source told ABC News.

2. And today (Tues 8 July) it was confirmed that Simon Mann will prolly spend the rest of his life behind bars for plotting to overthrow the tinpot government of Equatorial Guinea

3. In latest news from the ongoing G8 Summit, it seems Africa's current Class of 2008 Leaders continue to fiddle while Harare burns.
According to The Financial Times:

'Leaders from the developed world and Africa yesterday failed to agree on how to deal with the crisis in Zimbabwe, which overshadowed a meeting between the Group of Eight [G8] and seven African heads of state Appearing at a joint news conference with President George W Bush, Jakaya Kikwete, president of Tanzania and chairman of the African Union, said: "The only area where we may differ is on the way forward."'

Somehow that foolishly, fandangled frase gets to me:
The only area where we may differ is on the way forward

In other words, when it comes to African Quiet Diplomacy,
we simply don't know how to go forward ...

Or in other words, you might as well fuck me sideways



Friday, March 28, 2008

Three contenders + one asshole = Zim Power



Top image above: A "1oo 000 Bob Note" from an advert in Die Burger newspaper. Above: A classic Zapiro cartoon dated January 1999

Today is the day before the next Zimbabwean presidential elections.

Three contenders. One asshole.
His Excellency Robot Gabri-Hell Moo-Guppie (Zanu PF)
Morgan Tsvangerai (Movement for Democratic Change)
Simba Makoni (former Finance Mini-Sister)

I have a work colleague who constantly teases me about my Zimbabwean roots.

He laughs out loud and greets me daily with the slogan "Howzit Zim-Power".

As the election deadline looms, I've changed my nick to "Sim-Power" in honour of the Lion-Man, Simba Makoni.

Maybe it's better to let Moo-Guppie swindle another election.

Apparently he's hired a crack team of Israeli IT specialists to help him pack fudge (yes the fag innuendo is intended). But if he has a landslide victory, then maybe an avalanche similar to Kenya's latest woes might start. Give a blind, fool enough rope and Moo-Guppie might just hang himself. Like so many disenfranchised Zimbo's watching from the sidelines. I hope 2008 is a memorable year in the life of a new Zimbabwe. I hope and pray but I can't figure out what my gut is whispering to me.